Unfortunately coined by Wilhelm Stekel in the 1920s and unable to be stamped out, "paraphilia" is a misconception whose existence I disagree with, but we can't stop the shrinks from using it. It seems to be as ineradicable as the even more hotly debated "race." From dildos to rubber or leather apparel to cat-o'-nine-tails, whether they're sadists or masochists, tops or bottoms, masters or slaves, golden-shower queens or coprophiliacs, they're all condemned as "sick," "victims," and "abusers," especially the same-sex ones. No category is more controversial, more in question, and undergoing more change in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, the Holy Writ of psychiatrists and psychologists. Originally I titled this as Paraphernalia, what used to be called "kinky." Paraphilia under its many competing definitions still includes the three T's: transvestite, transsexual, and two-spirited -- categories that psychiatrists are still slyly trying to keep in their Baedeker of treatable mental dysphorias.